First of all, let me start this post by saying,
I’m sorry I have a life. No, that’s not what I wanted to say. I don’t remember the exact DATE… but ey, it was a long time ago. SOME MORE NEWS! The drawings AND the contest will have to be post-phoned until further notice…. but, I ain’t leavin’ ya with nothing! I have 3 new posts coming out this week, so keep a look out.
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I didn’t come up with these, but these are sarcastic and fun! (Like me!) So I decided, why not share it? By the way, number 2 is by me so… your welcome.
These are warnings people have on products/stuff:
1. Children’s Aspirin: Warning: Keep Away From Children
(So I’m supposed to give it to…?)
2. I am going to skip this number. Because. Just because. Yes.
3. Curling Iron: Warning: Do not use while sleeping
(shoot… that’s the only time I have to curl my hair!)
4. Candle: Warning: A burning candle is fire
(And you thought I didn’t know that…?)
5. Frozen Pizza: Warning: Do not eat before cooking
(Oh, thanks for the warning.)
6. Blanket from Taiwan: Warning: Not To Be Used As Protection From A Tornado
(And against the tornado it would do what…?)
7. Frisbee: Warning: May Contain Small Parts
(Oh, good to know.)
8. Butcher Knife: Warning: Keep Out of Children
(I thought we were supposed to stab them, though…)
9. Railroad Sign: Warning: Beware! To touch these wires is instant death. Anyone found doing so will be prosecuted.
(But I though it was instant death…)
10. Hair Coloring: Warning: Do not use as an ice cream topping
(But hair coloring tastes good on Mint Chocolate Chip!)
11. Dial Soap: Warning: Use like regular soap
(Oh, good, I thought the soap was radioactive.)
13. Puzzle: Warning: Some Assembly Required
(And you thought…?)
15. On a Sears hairdryer — Do not use while sleeping.
(Shoot, and that’s the only time I have to work on my hair.)
16. On a bag of Fritos — You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
(the shoplifter special?)
17. On some Swanson frozen dinners — “Serving suggestion: Defrost.”
(but, it’s “just” a suggestion).
18. On Tesco’s Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom) — “Do not turn upside down.”
(well…duh, a bit late, huh!)
19. On Marks & Spencer Brea
d Pudding — “Product will be hot after heating.”
(…and you thought??…)
20. On packaging for a Rowena iron — “Do not iron clothes on body.”
(but wouldn’t this save me more time)?
21. On Boot’s Children Cough Medicine — “Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication.”
(We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)
22. On Nytol Sleep Aid — “Warning: May cause drowsiness.”
(and…I’m taking this because??…)
23. On most brands of Christmas lights — “For indoor or outdoor use only.”
(as opposed to…what?)
24. On a Japanese food processor — “Not to be used for the other use.”
(now, somebody out there, help me on this. I’m a bit curious)
25. On Sainsbury’s peanuts — “Warning: contains nuts.”
(talk about a news flash)
26. On an American Airlines packet of nuts — “Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts.”
(Step 3: maybe, ooh…fly Delta?)
27. On a child’s Superman costume — “Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly.”
(I don’t blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)
28. On a Korean kitchen knife– “Warning: keep out of children.”
(hmm..something must have gotten lost in the translation…)
That’s all for now, have a lovely week, or a lovely weekend depending on… wherever you live.